So I got the packet of bacon out of the fridge and noticed that it had an ingredients list. I wondered for a minute - shouldn't it just be "Bacon: 100%"? - but it turned out to be a bit more itemised than just that.
The first item on the list was: "Pork: 62%".
Now, I might be a bit old-fashioned and naïve, but I'd have thought that the ingredients of bacon would be: Pork, and Salt. I'm fairly sure that, while bacon does tend to have quite a salty flavour, that it would be nowhere near 38% by weight, volume or any other measure you would want to use.
So, what else is in that 38%?
Normally I wouldn't be too worried, but over the past few months I've been reading some reviews of really cheap, really bad horror movies that a friend's been writing at Triskaidekafiles.
So now I'm thinking about all the weirdness that the bacon company could have put into their bacon before distributing it through the Elles Road New World Supermarket to unsuspecting customers such as myself.
So, if weird stuff suddenly starts happening down here... blame it on the bacon.
Happy Hallowe'en, those of you who celebrate it.